This sums it up


This is the second year of Christmas without Jacob and this year seems even worse, maybe because I was in such shock and denial last year – but the reality of a new life, returning back to school and living without Jacob is all starting to settle in. Kaitlin: you have to live and go on. Yes, the horrible reality of it all. But I think this treatment I have been going through is starting to help a little with my ability to process this “new normal” of my grief and my life going forward – but still, this year and I am not sure how many more in the future (likely very many)- fuck the holidays. 

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